AST Athlete Journal: Jamie Heisz
Hey ski friends, its Jamie again! I hope everyone has been doing their best to keep warm during these super cold days. It feels like it’s finally winter!
As the rest of the team is putting in the work on the hill at the height of our race season, I unfortunately am putting in the work in the gym to prepare myself for surgery. During our first training block back from the new year, I took quite a big tumble while skiing GS at Nakiska resulting in a significant knee injury, and I’d like to share the journey it has been so far and the long road of recovery I have ahead of me.
Throughout my athletic journey, I have always entertained the concept of “if you’re going to do something, do it well.” I guess I also felt the need to implement this when blowing my knee. Although I was in quite a lot of pain and not walking, I waited for my MRI results with delusion and the expectation of a little tweak in my knee. I thought that I would need maybe a day or two of rest, and then I’d be right back on snow. This sadly wasn’t the case. The results from my MRI showed tears in my ACL, LCL, lateral meniscus, medial meniscus, and posterior lateral corner, with a couple more sprains in a few other ligaments/muscles.
Of course, I knew the physical battle that I would endure, but what no one can prepare you for is the mental struggles that come along with the process. I have injured myself in the past, however, the concept of a season-ending injury has been foreign to me up until now. For ski racers like me, our sport is more than just a game and it has become a huge part of our identity. A significant thing that I have been struggling with is the fact that I not only have been losing time on the hill but also part of myself. It is a huge mental whiplash and a strange feeling going from 100% to 0% in one day. The abruptness was and has been disorienting, I feel like I woke up in a world that I’ve never been in. For me, movement has always been super present in my everyday life. I have never been used to consecutive unstructured days without the rhythm of training, racing, tuning, meeting with the team, etc. My days feel like they’re a million hours long. That being said, this has been a huge lesson for me; a lesson that I am more than just an athlete. I have been forced to confront who I am without the sport and learn that I have a purpose outside of ski racing.
I feel grateful to have a trainer like Nate who has been helping me come up with ideas to modify exercises and keep me strong in the gym. I have been able to grind out upper body and single leg workouts which has definitely kept me more sane. Aside from working out and “prehabbing” for surgery, I have been filling my time with learning how to crochet! Beanies have been the main project for now but I am excited for what further projects I have in store!
At the time I am writing this, I am 5 days out from my surgery. Due to how angry my knee was, it took a few weeks for the swelling to go down and for me to regain some range of motion. It would’ve been an even tougher rehab had they operated on an angry locked-out knee. To say I am excited would be a lie. This will be my first surgery and I have been struggling to go into it with a positive mindset. I guess I still have 5 days to toughen up!! Although the long road of post-op rehab ahead of me seems scary, I know I am capable of tackling it like a beast. Not only do I feel inspired by my two teammates, Aidan and Caleb who have shown nothing but resilience and strength through their recovery, but I feel grateful for the support they’ve shown me since I’ve crashed. While watching races on live timing from my bed, I can still proudly say I am always super grateful for our team’s support this season! Karbon Sports, GMC Canada, Genstar, Mountain Fire Foods, and Gearup Sports, thank you!!!